What I Wish I Knew About the Baby Blues Before they Hit Me

The baby blues were one of the toughest things I experienced during postpartum, so my hope it to share my experience so hopefully others can be better prepared than I was.

I was completely caught off guard by the baby blues when they hit me. Truly they were the hardest part of postpartum, labor, birth, and pregnancy for me personally. Part of why it was so difficult was how wildly unprepared I was for them.

I want to share my experience to hopefully better prepare any other new moms out there, although I’ll be honest I’m 6 months postpartum now so some of it’s fuzzy. But I do believe that being more aware of it would be helpful!

This post is all about my baby blues experience.

The baby blues sounds like a very cutesy name for what it actually is! In my mind, it kind of downplays it in a way.

In reality, the baby blues is a period following birth, usually around 5 days afterwards, where your body goes through a crash. Pregnancy, birth, and postpartum is a huge hormonal shift for your body. The baby blues is basically your body in withdrawal from the intense surge of hormones that your body is experiencing all throughout pregnancy. It takes some time for your body to readjust, aka – baby blues.

The baby blues is different than postpartum depression, but that is something I’m not super knowledgable in. A quick google search will yield tons of comparison articles so you can learn the difference.

I’ve read different things on how common the baby blues are. I wonder if part of it is that that time postpartum is such a blur of adjustment and sleep deprivation, so some women just forget.

What the baby blues looked like for me:

• Intense negative emotions
• Long periods of sobbing uncontrollably
• Feeling numb/catatonic
• Not feeling like myself
• Overall feeling down
• Extreme separation anxiety from both baby and husband
• No appetite (perhaps that’s just general postpartum symptom)
• Very stressed about my husbands sleep deprivation
• Easily triggered
• Hot and cold flashes
• Intense anxiety about the baby
• Intrusive thoughts about bad things happening to the baby
• Waking up from nap would trigger it resulting in anxiety surrounding sleep (making things worse I’m sure since sleep deprivation probably didn’t help)

None of these were constant, it was waves. Intense waves. The periods of feeling good were shorter than the periods of feeling bad.

RELATED POST: 9 Things I Had No Idea Happened Immediately After You Give Birth

What helped me through the baby blues:

I learned a variety of things that helped me get through the low period as well as what typically triggered me so that I could avoid that.

I figured out that sleeping away from my baby and husband, and thus waking up alone, was a major trigger. It always resulted in waking up feeling absolutely awful, sobbing, and a general emotional mess. Once I figured this out, I took my naps on the couch while my husband was on duty with the baby so I could be near them. While I probably didn’t get as deep of sleep compared to being in a different room, it helped so much, more so than getting more sleep.

Things that helped:

• Reading other women’s experiences (usually on Reddit) and seeing how long it lasted for them. I needed the constant reminder that it was temporary and would be ending soon
• Showering
• Getting outside/having an activity for that day
• Distractions like a funny show
• Talking to my husband about it
• Leaning into the crying felt like a major release. It was like I could feel my body shedding the hormones and readjusting
• Taking notes for myself of each day to be able to see progress
• Remembering/my husband reminding me that progress was not going to be linear and to look for the overall trend to be upwards
• Going up in dosage in my anxiety medication – DO NOT hesitate to reach out to your doctor if you need extra help.

How long does the baby blues last:

Everything I read (which I did so obsessively) said that it typically was over by the 2-3 weeks postpartum mark. I would say throughout week 2 it was tapering off, and it was totally finished by the week 3. The last day of notes I took was day 18 postpartum. I don’t think it was totally done that day, but it was getting less and less and at that point I could tell it was tapering so less to take notes about.

For some it lasts longer, for others shorter.

RELATED POST: What to Expect For Your First Postpartum Poop

What I wish I knew before the baby blues hit me:

The number one thing I wish I knew was that it is TEMPORARY.

I hated not knowing when it was going to end. I was terrified it was going to be how I felt from here on out.

I also just wish I knew that it was a thing, lol. I had heard of the baby blues, but I didn’t realize how intense they can be for some people. I wish I knew that, I wish I had read other women’s experiences.

In summary:

Obviously in the end, it all worked out okay. The baby blues ended. I have my sweet baby boy. In the grand scheme of things, it was a very short period of time.

But, it was hard. It was the hardest part of postpartum (and I had a 3rd degree tear 👀), and the entire pregnancy experience. I truly believe that if I had known a bit more of what to expect, it would have made things significantly easier for me. I would have known to just ride the waves, and that they’d pass soon enough.

I hope this gives you a glimpse into what to possibly expect come postpartum. I hope this doesn’t scare you, but rather empowers you. It is intense, but temporary.

My dms and email is always open if you need to chat ❤️

This post was all about my baby blues experience.